The Jess Song

I wrote a song for Jess, in no way shape or form is it inspired or a rip off of John Legend’s ‘All of me’ ….okay, it is. Just think yourself lucky I didn’t record me singing it! I recon I’m a good 1000 blogs away from becoming YouTube confident. Can you imagine the amount of bleeps I would need to add to cover my language?! Jesus, no. I’d need an 18 rating!

It’s best you have the tune of ‘All of me’ in your head before you read my ‘song’ – which I’m going to title….mmm, thinking….yup, ‘All of Jess’. Oft, telling you, if I don’t start winning award’s for my strokes of genius soon, well, there’s going to be a global outcry! Continue reading “The Jess Song”

30 Things… you will want to teach your toddler immediately.

Continuing with the long run up to my big 3-0 celebrations (previous 30 things), I have complied a list of 30 things you will want to teach your toddler immediately.

I may not have won any patenting awards just yet, but listen, toddlers are grade A tormentors and if you want your life to be as easy as possible, then there a few pivotal things you must teach them… Continue reading “30 Things… you will want to teach your toddler immediately.”

30 Things…that really peeve me off

Continuing with the long run up to my big 3-0 celebrations (previous 30 things), I have complied a list of 30 things that really peeve me (piss me right) off. Maybe I’m getting old, bitter and grumpy as I’m fast approaching my 30s. Maybe I’m fed up with people’s shit. Or maybe I’m grumpy as I live off a diet of sugar and caffeine and it’s been at least 2 hours since my last sugar hit.

Who cares! I’m going to moan my tits off. Continue reading “30 Things…that really peeve me off”