Wednesday wisdom

It’s Wednesday! What better day to share some wisdom! It has nothing to do with the wonderful Wednesday wisdom alliteration.

10. No self service with toddlers – ever

Regardless of how few items you may be carrying, if you have a toddler in the vicinity do not use a self service checkout. There are several reasons why this is not a wise move:

  1. If you are using a self service til you had best be quick. No one likes to wait in the supposedly quicker checkout. Toddlers don’t do quick unless it’s sprinting onto a busy road.
  2. Toddlers don’t stand still, thus causing a caffufle as people hurry to use a till while toddler is doing her best ‘ring of roses’ rendition.
  3. The most important factor – your toddler will become and ‘unexpected item in the bagging area’. Thus rendering the self checkout useless.

You got kids with you? Do yourself and everyone else a favour and join the massive queue for a (wo)manned checkout, the staff enjoy baby smiles and you’ll get 0.01 seconds peace from your child while they chat.

11. Google Stuff (other search engines are available)

Before sharing annnnything on social media, go and Google it. Seriously, you would think in this day and age with an overload of information at our finger tips this wouldn’t need to be said. But, nope.

You might be sharing a well meaning animal video or ‘facts’ or a political post to enlighten the masses, but if you haven’t googled it, don’t share it. The best example to use would be political posts, on masquerading as a ‘look how hard done by these honest working people are, they receive no benefits while foreigners come steal out jobs’ – It’s a lot of crap, propaganda to fuel hate, usually with nonexistent ‘facts and figures’. Same goes for healthy/organic/vegan food. Most people have an agenda (money making) so go check the source and validity of the information before you share.

Don’t be a pawn and don’t look a fool, always check yo’posts.

12. Look for the signs

Listen, if your high-waisted jeans start becoming ‘normal’ rise jeans and your spilling out the top, then I’m afraid you are kidding yourself on and need to put the chocolate down.

As much as you would like to deny it, your jeans are signalling that, you are in fact, over indulging and they simply are not equipped to hold you in anymore. They had your back, they really did, but you pushed them. You pushed them too far this time. They no longer can be those slim high-waisted jeans you once loved, they need constant pulling up over the pouch.They are brutal. They are low rise. They are a sign.

Listen to your jeans, they are so much more than clothing. They are your chubby compass. Treat them with respect or you too will suffer the consequences.

Heed the signs.

I’m so wise, I know. I shall be back next Wednesday with more words of wisdom.

🙂

Previous wisdom Wednesday Wisdom 19th April

 

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