Grieving the baby I could not love
September 27, 2020For 6 months I’ve sat with a feeling I couldn’t place. Most times I would fret my mind was sinking into depression, how could I be incredibly happy, yet have an awful wrench in my stomach. Easy to well up when thinking about my second baby in relation to having my first. Feeling as if the breath has been taken from me replaced with a weight on my chest when I try to remember all the milestones from my first baby – which I cannot. To describe the base feeling I had when I came across a stash of old…
We don’t owe the birth of our baby to anyone other than us.
Being a female, there’s an ingrained sense of ‘owing’. We owe it to other people to cover up our bodies, not to make them uncomfortable. Whether that be a big busted lady daring to wear a…
Asking A Couple ‘When’ They Are Having Children Is Rude. Fucking Stop It.
‘How’s the sex life?’ ‘Is your marriage actually committed?’ ‘I hear impotence starts to become a problem at your age, how is that going?’ ‘You’ve only know each other 2 years, is that not too soon for…
Pregnancy after Post Natal Depression
Hesitant to say ‘better’ or ‘healed’, the post natal depression, or depression (at what point do we switch and drop the post natal?) I suffered is very much off the boil, not even on a lower heat…
Parenthood: Once bitten, twice not so fucking shy
Parenthood changes your entire life. Heck, even wanting children changes your life. The journey into parenthood is different for each family, and so, the ride of parenthood is different. Of course, parents share similarities, the overwhelming responsibility,…
Baby Baking: Week 5 – Return of the Porn Tits
Thankfully, the big auld bloat that was threatening to destroy my wardrobe has simmered its self. For now I know. I’m only going to grow, but seriously, there was absolutely no need for the 6 month pregnant…
My pregnancy is not a secret, just none of your business.
The choice for us to not share a baby announcement when we found out really early at about week 5, was primarily my choice. I knew before the 2 lines appeared that I wanted to keep this…
Baby Baking: Weeks 0-3
A fucking knew it – the mentally uttered words. I had known for weeks I was carrying a stow away. When people tell you they ‘knew’ they were pregnant straight away, you always give I the ‘aye,…
Postnatal depression really fucked up my relationship
The impact of depression on our long term relationship
Simmer down with your angry Femininst agenda.
Feminism – as I understand it, means equality for the sexes. However, I often hesitate to describe myself as a feminist. I will use the word ‘feminist’, after all, I want equality for everyone. But I tend…
Knock Knock! Who’s There? Depression! Oh FFS.
*tries to hide behind door from depression* A while ago, I wrote about how I believed I was gaining my freedom from depression, and I am. I have good spells and low dips, sometimes a dip so…
